Well, there are some pretty big changes pending in our lives right now. Changes where normally, I want to take the reigns and have total control so everything will go just as I want them to...which would lead to me saying NO a lot. I mean, it's scary not to, right? Change. Is. Scary.
Ha! What's that saying? If you want to make God laugh, just tell him your plans...
I started reading this eBook two days ago by Lysa TerKeurst called What Happens When Women Say Yes to God. I haven't made it far in the book but I'm sure I'll finish it by this weekend. I'm loving everything I read and the timing couldn't be better.
In Lysa's book, she gives this great analogy of a surprise birthday party. I'll paraphrase here so just bear with me: You're throwing your loved one a surprise party. Everyone is in their hiding places in the room and the anticipation of jumping up and yelling "surprise!" for the guest of honor is thick in the air. Your loved ones car pulls up into the driveway and everyone hushes themselves. Instead of coming through the front door where the party is stationed though, your loved one goes around the house and enters through the back door. You run to them to persuade them to go through the front door. Despite your ushering them, they decline, saying they're too tired, too busy, maybe later or they simply don't want to. Obviously, in that situation, you'd feel disappointed because they missed out on something grand, something you worked hard on preparing.
Lysa likened this to how God must feel when instead of telling him YES, we tell him NO for whatever reason and end up missing the blessing he had in store for us when he asks us to do something. It's kind of sad how we (myself very much included) tend to not see the forest for the trees. I am a VERY detail oriented person. I like to know everything I can possibly know going into a situation, leaving a situation, creating a situation, etc. Unfortunately, because of that, I sometimes get too caught up in the what ifs, how to's and whys and in the end, miss the big picture a.k.a. the party, the fun, the fiesta!
We're now facing one of those moments where we're in the driveway and have to decide...are we going to the party or shall we flake out for whatever lame reason we can pull out of the air?
We're all friends, right? Let me fill you in on what's going on...
Three years ago we left the country and moved to the big city for better jobs, better pay, a better home, a better life. This was undoubtedly God's will for us due to several circumstances that I won't go into today. Due to this move, our marriage has strengthened immensely and our relationship with God has grown tremendously over the past three years. However, for the last twelve months, we've both felt that pull to leave the city and call the country our home again. It all started when we participated in a group Bible study back home last fall, but that's another story in itself.
You see, where we live now, we're on our own. No family. No church home. No friends. No support system. Everyone and everything that we care about in our life is 90+ minutes down the road (a huge blessing in disguise for our marriage those first two years) So, for the past three years, we've made that trek nearly every weekend to get our weekly dose of friends, family and church, often times in separate vehicles due to our schedules. Trust me, the packing, the driving, the stopping to pee every thirty minutes, the unpacking again, the housework that piles up back at the house...it's emotionally and physically taxing on ones mind and body. Especially when it's done every. single. week.
Colin (my husband) and I have had countless discussions for what it would take to move back home. What about our jobs? Will we be able to afford to pay our bills if we move? We've analyzed every possible pro and con. We've prayed together for direction in what we should do, what our next step should be. We certainly don't want to go against God's will for our lives. After all, saying YES to leaving everything behind before has blessed us tremendously. Is He asking us to do it again? But...but...
Is God now bringing us back full circle? Certainly, if he wasn't, we both wouldn't feel this tug on our hearts every time we drive away to go back to the city. Yet, the only action we've taken...has been no action at all.
Lord, guide us down the path you'd have us take. Open our minds and hearts to be sensitive to your Spirit and obedient to your instruction. Open our eyes and ears to be receptive to your orchestration of our lives so we clearly know what direction to proceed in...even if it's only one piece of the puzzle at a time.
What's holding us back? Well...the more I think about it, the more I chew on it, the more I read the Bible and now this great tool that Lysa TerKeurst has provided, I'm coming to the conclusion that it is simply...
In Matthew 19, a young rich man comes up to Jesus asking him how to get into heaven. Despite following the commandments, he is unwilling to let go of his earthly treasures as Jesus asks him to do and sadly leaves.
Now, we're by no means rich, trust me. But as I sit here and contemplate the main reason why I have yet to budge from where I'm at...I realize it's money that is my key issue. Am I just like the young rich man who walks away from Jesus simply because he doesn't want to let go of his money? *big sigh* *cosmic 2X4 to the face*
I don't want to be that. My husband certainly doesn't want to be that. What is our inactivity really telling God? I don't trust you. I'm too afraid to give this up to you. NO.
WOW.
And those who know your name put their trust in you,
for you, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you ~Psalm 9:10
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths. ~Proverbs 3:5-6
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths. ~Proverbs 3:5-6
“Behold, God is my salvation;
I will trust, and will not be afraid;
for the Lord God is my strength and my song,
and he has become my salvation.” ~Isaiah 12:1-2
I will trust, and will not be afraid;
for the Lord God is my strength and my song,
and he has become my salvation.” ~Isaiah 12:1-2
...and my absolute favorite. I have it hanging up at work where I can see it everyday:
“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,
whose trust is the Lord.
He is like a tree planted by water,
that sends out its roots by the stream,
and does not fear when heat comes,
for its leaves remain green,
and is not anxious in the year of drought,
for it does not cease to bear fruit.” ~Jeremiah 17:7-8
whose trust is the Lord.
He is like a tree planted by water,
that sends out its roots by the stream,
and does not fear when heat comes,
for its leaves remain green,
and is not anxious in the year of drought,
for it does not cease to bear fruit.” ~Jeremiah 17:7-8
I cannot claim to believe these anointed words if I do not ACT on them. I do, most certainly, believe every word of the Bible and the simple act of writing these verses for this blog has amazingly soothed my soul. (love that!)
I want to be a Yes Woman. I want to fully and completely trust God so when he comes a'knocking (and believe me, HE IS!), I will say YES before I even know what it is He is asking of me. Lysa says in her eBook that she prays each morning this simple prayer:
God, I want to see You. God, I want to hear You. God I want to follow hard after You. Even before I know what I will face today, I say YES to You.
Well, I believe it's time I quit worrying so much about our money. God will provide. I believe it's time I quit worrying about our possessions. God has already given us all that we need. I believe it's time I stop being afraid of the 'what if's' for the road ahead and let go of these reigns that I should have never picked up in the first place. Besides, God promises he's got a prosperous and hopeful future laid out for us (Jeremiah 29:11).
What am I saying?
YES, JESUS!!!
Tonight, just like every Friday night, we are making the hour in a half drive to the farm for the weekend. Only this time, it's different. This time we're going to take action instead of wistfully saying "oh, someday wouldn't it be nice to come back home...". I don't know our time frame outside of 'soon'. I don't know the specifics outside of where we'll go. One thing I DO know is that we're trusting God wholly and completely to lead us as we welcome a new change that he has most assuredly had planned all from the start. His timing is and always has been perfect.
We're coming home, folks. We're coming home. Get ready to party :)
Check out Lysa's book here: http://lysaterkeurst.com/what-happens-when-women-say-yes-to-god/
photo credit: http://www.famfaith.org/outreach/SunsetGap.htm
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